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The Disease to Please: Curing the People-Pleasing Syndrome

Curing the People-pleasing Syndrome

Harriet Braiker

Buch (Taschenbuch, Englisch)
Buch (Taschenbuch, Englisch)
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What's wrong with being a "people pleaser?" Plenty!

"A fascinating book... If you struggle with where, when, and how to draw the line between your own desires and the demands of others, buy this book!"­­Kay Redfield Jamison, bestselling author of An Unquiet Mind and Night Falls Fast

People pleasers are not just nice people who go overboard trying to make everyone happy. Those who suffer from the Disease to Please are people who say "Yes" when they really want to say "No." For them, the uncontrollable need for the elusive approval of others is an addiction. Their debilitating fears of anger and confrontation force them to use "niceness" and "people-pleasing" as self-defense camouflage.

Featured on NBC's "Today," The Disease to Please explodes the dangerous myth that "people pleasing" is a benign problem. Best-selling author and frequent "Oprah" guest Dr. Harriet Braiker offers clear, positive, practical, and easily do-able steps toward recovery.

Begin with a simple but revealing quiz to discover what type of people-pleaser you are. Then learn how making even small changes to any single portion of the Disease to Please Triangle - involving your thoughts, feelings, and behavior - will cause a dramatic, positive and long-lasting change to the overall syndrome.

As a recovered peoplepleaser, you will finally see that a balanced way of living that takes others into consideration but puts the emphasis first on pleasing yourself and gaining your own approval is the clearest path to health and happiness.

Dr. Harriet Braiker (Pasadena, CA), is a practicing psychologist for over 20 ears, is the author of several psychology books and has been a frequent guest on The Oprah Winfrey Show as well as many other national talk shows.


Einband Taschenbuch
Seitenzahl 304
Erscheinungsdatum 16.03.2002
Sprache Englisch
ISBN 978-0-07-138564-0
Reihe NTC Self-Help
Verlag KNV Besorgung
Maße (L/B/H) 22.8/15.3/2.2 cm
Gewicht 454 g
Abbildungen mit Illustrationen
Auflage 31. Dr.


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  • Introduction
    Chapter 1: The Disease to Please Triangle: The Price of Nice
    Part One: People-Pleasing Mindsets
    Chapter 2: Toxic Thoughts
    Chapter 3: It's Okay Not to Be Nice
    Chapter 4: Putting Others First
    Chapter 5: There's More to You Than How Much You Do
    Chapter 6: Nice People Can Say "No"
    Part Two: People-Pleasing Habits
    Chapter 7: Learning to Please: Approval Addiction
    Chapter 8:Why Can't You Get Your Parents' Approval?
    Chapter 9: Love at All Costs
    Chapter 10: Romantic Addiction
    Part Three: People-Pleasing Feelings
    Chapter 11: Once More,Without Feelings
    Chapter 12: The Fear of Anger
    Chapter 13:Words Can Really Hurt You
    Chapter 14: How Far Would You Go to Avoid a Confrontation?
    Chapter 15: Small Steps, Big Changes
    The 21-Day Action Plan for Curing the Disease to Please
    A User's Guide to the 21-Day Action Plan
    Day 1: Don't Say "Yes"When You Want to Say "No"
    Day 2: The Broken Record Technique
    Day 3: The Counteroffer
    Day 4:What to Say If You Want to Say "No": The SandwichTechnique
    Day 5: The Reverse Sandwich Technique
    Day 6: Rewriting the Ten Commandments of People-Pleasing
    Day 7: Rewriting the Seven Deadly Shoulds
    Day 8: Taking Care of You
    Day 9: Talking Yourself Out of Approval Addiction
    Day 10: To Do or Not to Do, That Is the Question
    Day 11: Tag, You're It
    Day 12: It's Okay Not to Be Nice
    Day 13: The Anger Scale
    Day 14: The Relaxation Breath
    Day 15: Anger-Up
    Day 16: Anger-Down
    Day 17: TIME OUT
    Day 18: Stress Inoculation
    Day 19: Solve a Problem with a Friend, Not for a Friend
    Day 20: Correcting Faulty Assumptions
    Day 21: Celebrate Your Cure
    Epilogue: Some Final Thoughts